Dual....:-)
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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