Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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