he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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