Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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