with your own penis?
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Panties = found
Randomize
