oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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