just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Randomize
