Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Randomize
