Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
