Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
