Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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