I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
