Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize