we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
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