Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
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