But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
