Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
