I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Randomize
