And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
