She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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