are you so shy because you have an std?
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Randomize
