Kiss
Puke
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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