You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
