We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
ttyl tear gas
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
