It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Who died my cat blue again?
Randomize
