His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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