I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Randomize