yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Randomize