So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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