i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
I think a kid would responsible me up
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
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