sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize