discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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