p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
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