Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I should be sponsored by Trojan
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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