I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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