Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
Randomize