dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
That was before I lit my hair on fire
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
