Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
