I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Randomize