So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Randomize
