please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
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