cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
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