the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
