I've blown a few things in my day
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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