office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Randomize
