When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Im part way to drunk.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Randomize
