im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
We had to coat check the pizza.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Randomize
