doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
