Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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