I wanna bring you to show and tell
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
why is half of my head shaved?
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