Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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